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SERVICES · TICKET #IT-000102 · STATUS: TOLD YOU SO

Cybersecurity

Cybersecurity is extremely important. Which is why we will begin every conversation with:

Told you so
"You really should have listened to us earlier."

Then we will sell you a solution that costs slightly more than your entire IT budget.

Our security stack

Security awareness training
A 90-minute video. You won't watch it. Neither did we.
Phishing simulations
We send fake phishing emails to your staff. Then we send real invoices. You'll learn to tell them apart. Eventually.
Multi-factor authentication
We turn it on, then turn it off for the CEO because he found it "annoying."
Firewall management
It blocks everything. Including you. Especially you.
Incident response
See the quote at the top of this page. Then see our invoice.
Compliance
We'll say "HIPAA," "PCI," and "NIST" in a single sentence. You'll feel secure. That's what compliance is.

The annoyingly correct part

You don't need a jerk to tell you this, but here it is: MFA on every account (CEO included), backups you've actually test-restored, and patches applied on a schedule stop most of what hits small businesses. Start there before anyone sells you a dashboard.